Am I a Dummy…for using a Dummy?

The great dummy debate!

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Pre-baby we make all these promises to ourselves based on the kind of parent we’d like to be, but then reality hits doesn’t it? Things change and the stuff we say we’ll never do, we end up doing.

I bet giving your child a dummy is high on the list of things people say that won’t use then do. I never swore against dummies completely. Why? Well (confession time), I’m a thumb sucker. At 31 years old, I have managed to cut it down to just on a night but, as much as I try, I can’t cut it out altogether. I have set many goals to stop me doing it such as, when we got married, when I got pregnant and when the baby was born but here we are 20.5 months on from birth and I still haven’t managed to stop.

This one reason was why I didn’t rule out the dummy. I really didn’t want my son sucking his thumb. As much as it looks uber cute, I know how hard it is to stop and I didn’t want him to have that challenge in life…if I could help it. Dummies get called a ‘soothers’ for a reason, if it soothes Mini R and make him feel better when he’s tired or upset, deterring him from turning to his thumb, then a dummy it is!

We’ve been fairly lucky as Mini R is not dependant on it as such:

  • He has it if he is upset or going to sleep.
  • He happily (nine times out of ten) will leave his dummy and taggie blanket in his cot on a morning.
  • He does not wander around with his dummy time for no reason, nor does he have a dummy clip. I like to make the decisions as to when he has it.

Recently, now he is learning and becoming more aware, he has started asking for his dummy when there is no reason why he’d need it. This is shortly followed by a tantrum when I refuse to give it to him. I’m not going to lie, the first few times this happened I wasn’t sure what to do, so i did was every FTM does, I made it up! He was getting in such a state that I gave him the dummy, but I sat him in the corner and told him that if he wanted the dummy he had to stay there. He’s really good at sitting on the Naughty Spot when asked at the moment. After a minute or so, I asked for his dummy, he gave me it and got on with playing – Mummy – 1 Mini R – 0! Let’s see how long that lasts!

The other downside of the dummy is night-times. Mini R doesn’t, and never has, woke up or got upset every time his dummy falls out and I reckon, most of the time, he finds it himself in his cot (glow in the dark dummies are brilliant for this!) He’s in a phase currently where, two or three times a night, he whimpers and sits up. I have to go in, lay him down, find his dummy and taggie if he’s lost it and leave. He settles easily but it’s still a pain and it does worry me about the future of nights without a dummy.

My plan is to continue with being strict regarding when he has it and hopefully give the dummies to Santa or the birthday fairy…definitely not before we got to Australia though. Anything to keep him quiet on the plane!

Pictures left to right: bedtime snuggles watching ITNG, rocking the strawberry shower cap before bath time, dummy dreams and sleep snuggles. (Note: all before bedtime when he’s settling down for sleeps.)

Where do you stand on the dummy? Have you used one? Did your child refuse them? What alternative did you have? If you’ve weaned a child off a dummy, please give me the secret to your success! Comment below or find me on Facebook and Twitter.

 

Keep Calm and Carry On Linking Sunday

About Educating Roversi

30 something wife and Mum to one. Blogging about parenthood, home, days out and anything else that takes my fancy!
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26 Responses to Am I a Dummy…for using a Dummy?

  1. Natalie Petrovic says:

    We’re exactly like you guys, we didn’t want to use one but Joshua was a ‘sucky baby’ as the midwife called him and wanted the comfort. He now has it at sleep time with baa baa, but sometimes ask for it during the day and always wants it in the car on the way home from nursery! I often try and distract him but it often leads to a tantrum! Now that Finley’s here I’ve started saying that dummies are for babies to try and encourage him to give it up and I keep asking if he’s ready to throw it in the bin…. He’s getting the idea but not looking forward to the day we do it!! 😁 Expect we’ll have a few rough nights and no idea how I’ll get him back off after a bad dream but it’s just something else to tackle!

    Liked by 1 person

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  3. Silly Mummy says:

    I agree about the thumb sucking – I think dummies are preferable as an easier habit to break, & I was told (though don’t know if it’s true) that anyone who does not suck their thumb by 2-3 years is unlikely ever to start. My eldest has always used a dummy for sleep, youngest occasionally for sleep. Eldest used to be given it during day if upset sometimes too, but we stopped her having it for anything but sleep at 6 months. I think people worry too much about them – I don’t think it matters much whether you do or don’t use them in most situations. I think if children are so dependent on them once they are talking age that they talk round them or don’t talk in favour of using dummy, that can be a problem to speech development. But I think that’s pretty rare. Using them to settle for sleep I think is probably not really so bad and most will give it up in their own time. #KCACOLS

    Liked by 1 person

  4. I went to great lengths to try and encourage Jet to take a dummy, but he preferred screaming. Stella on the other hand is addicted to hers – we follow a similar rule to you – she has it in her bed for sleeping only – but now she sneaks upstairs to go and find it, giving herself away by announcing “dummy!” loud and clear over the baby monitor 😉
    x Alice
    #kcacols

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  5. *Whispers* I’m a thumb-sucker too!

    We used a dummy with T and he had it until he was around 2.5 yo. We had tried to reduce and restrict but I just kept giving in and it was giving him mixed signals so in the end we went cold turkey. I was expecting total hell for at least a few days but he actually dealt with it surprisingly well. We chose the dummy fairy method and he got a present for giving them up. Several months on and we’ve never looked back. I would do it again in a heartbeat, wish my parents had given me one lol!

    I wrote a blog post about it if you’re interested. I’ll Tweet it to you 🙂 #kcacols

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Tin Box Tot had a dummy for about two weeks but wasn’t really interested. Tin Box Baby is a whole different story. She’s addicted! At 10 months old I’m not too worried about it but I know I’m going to have to come up with a very cunning plan to remove it from her at some stage! It has ben so useful for comforting her though. Thanks so much for linking up with #KCACOLS and I hope you van make it again next week x

    Liked by 1 person

  7. The Pramshed says:

    We haven’t used a dummy, but that is only because our little one didn’t take to it. We went through a phase where she was very sucky on the boob – often for hours and hours, and thought that she was comforting herself. I’m sure that you will be able to wean your son off the dummy soon, you could say it’s gone to the fairies/elves etc….Good luck with it. Claire x#KCACOLS

    Liked by 1 person

  8. I found my thumb when I was 5 months old, as my folks didn’t want me having a dummy. Breastfeeding helped keep the thumb sucking at bay for sometime, but it is a great comforter. We’ll see what happens when I’m older but I only suck it when I’m mega tired…. #KCACOLS Good luck with the dummy wean xx

    Liked by 1 person

  9. Mrs Tubbs says:

    The Tubblet had a dummy and then lost interest in it. I think every child is different so some love them and others don’t take to them at all

    Liked by 1 person

  10. ljdove23 says:

    Only one of my four has had a dummy and she was an absolute nightmare to wean her off it! Infact she has only just got rid of it now and she was four the other week. It was sooooo hard and yet in the end we just waited until she was ready. I really regretted letting her have one as she has done damage to her teeth with it (hopefully will correct itself now she has stopped) but at the time it was a necessity!!! #KCACOLS

    Liked by 1 person

  11. crummymummy1 says:

    We have never used them as both of mine used my boob instead!! I have been tempted though! #KCACOLS

    Liked by 1 person

  12. Good luck with weaning off the dummy. We used christmas as our opportunity and explained that they needed to be posted to the christmas fairy so she could use them for the new babies and that if we didn’t send them back then Father Christmas wouldn’t be able to bring any presents. It worked though 🙂 #KCACOLS

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  13. Kat says:

    My daughter had a dummy until she was about 16 months old, we spent a week trying to get rid of it but instead swapped a dummy for a bottle of milk at bedtime which lasted until she was two and a half. But I would use a dummy again, or try to because I am all for a bit of peace! #KCACOLS

    Liked by 1 person

  14. Robyn says:

    Cool I didn’t know you could get glow in the dark dummies!! My toddler was given one at the hospital when he was born. If I remember rightly he already had it the first time I saw him post-delivery, or very shortly thereafter. I wasn’t that happy about it, but apparently it was because he was prem and needed it to develop his sucking reflex. At 16 months he now just has it at bed time or if we’re going a long way in the car. The odd time that he hasn’t napped well and he’s a bit cranky I let him have it too. I haven’t really got a plan about how and when to remove it, but I anticipate a few rough nights!

    Liked by 1 person

  15. Coombe Mill says:

    I must say I can’t get excited by them one way or the other, if they help use them, I tried but my kids spat them out and carried on crying!

    Liked by 1 person

  16. Emma Jones says:

    I used dummies and my children had good speak and teeth and gave them up surprisingly easy. I was really worried especially about bedtime so didn’t withdraw them entirely until nearly 3. Dummy fairy worked a treat & no tears. #kcacols lifeinthemumslane

    Liked by 1 person

  17. Well we’re at 23 months and still using a dummy. Hopefully we’ll get rid of it soon, but right now we’re just working on lowering how dependant she is on it. I’m a firm believer in parents doing whatever gets them through, and dummies work! #KCACOLS

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  18. moderatemum says:

    I tried really hard to give Roscoe a dummy and he refused. I bought about 15 different varieties and he always just spat them out. Got great guns rocking him to sleep though.

    Liked by 1 person

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