You know that moment when you’re going about you’re daily business and suddenly there is a hideous smell wafting under your nostrils? You get a feeling of dread in the pit of your stomach, not the fear of dealing with a poonami, but the fear of dealing with the wriggley mite!
Getting a nappy on my boy (9 times out of 10) is a very stressful activity and I’m sure many parents can relate…
It wasn’t always like this. Back in the newborn days he laid on the baby changing mat, gurgling at the ceiling, cracking the odd smile and generally being a cutie pie…apart from the first week when he screamed as if I was murdering him not changing his nappy!
Since Mini Me started moving about I feel like I need to be trained as a Pro Wrestler!!!! I just about manage to get the dirty nappy off before (thanks Teaching Mum for the inspiration) my Ninja Flippin’ son is over on his front and he’s off like a sprint crawler! I drag him back, which obviously he thinks is hilarious, and I make the first attempt at getting a clean nappy on him but he’s off again: flip and sprint! The third or fourth time he doesn’t find it so funny and starts to protest. Obviously I try reasoning with him: “The more you flip the longer it’ll take and the less playtime you’ll get” but he’s 13.5 months old and doesn’t get this. Then I try a different tactic “Right, wander around with your bits out! See if I care!” which lasts all of 30 seconds before I’m wrestling him to the ground again for fear of him piddling on the floor…or worse!
The whole ordeal ends with him in tears, no amount of toys will keep in still for me to get the bloody nappy on him so I have to let him cry and feel like the worst mother ever. This is why a lot of the photo’s I take of my son in the afternoon picture him in no trousers, no way am I starting that battle again if I don’t need to!
I hope that the day will come when he realises it’s quicker to not fight me but until then I better get practising my “Standing Moonsault” (I don’t actually know what this is and thank Wikipedia for the name.)