My Birth Story

MY BIRTH STORY
Yesterday I saw my friend whom I haven’t seen since BB (before baby) and I was telling him about the random, silly things that happened whilst I was in labour. He made the suggestion that I make a blog post out of it as my antics made him chuckle, so that’s what I’m doing. 
 
Most women who have had a baby love to tell their birth story, unless they’ve had a horrendous traumatic time. Then they never want to speak of it again. I was lucky as I had a fairly straight forward birth: it was during the day, no complications and I was home four hours after I’d had him. Not too shabby at all. 
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However during the process of Mini R making his way into the world, many things happened that, now looking back on it all, are fairly amusing. 
 
Firstly, my mum, bless her heart…well she’s a witterer. She stresses about things and worries (because she cares about people a lot)…totally the opposite of me (I care but I don’t worry). Despite these traits I chose her as my other birthing partner and I’m so glad I did. Her and my husband were a dream team but most of my funny anecdotes come from my mums actions on the day! For example, when we went to the car to go to the Pinderfields Hospital, I’m leaning against the car, mid contraction, while my mum is saying “Maybe I should go in my car?” My husband “Parking is expensive. Probably best to go in one car.” This continued for what seemed (to me) to be a lifetime before I exclaimed “CAN WE JUST GET IN THE CAR?!” Mum: Oh yeah! Sorry love! 😂
 
Once at hospital my mum and husband took it upon themselves to have a mini picnic and when I woke up from a drowsy moment, a sandwich was being passed in front of my face! 
 
Possibly the funniest mum moment during my labour involved granola bars. I had some in my suitcase for snacking on during labour but when Mum gave me one, due to the gas and air my mouth was dry, and the bar turned into clay in my mouth. After that, my Mum started dipping them in her tea – at the time this was the BEST TASTE EVER! However, one time she dipped and I started having a contraction. My mental image to this day is of my mum stood by the bed holding a granola bar over her mug saying “But I’ve dipped! It’s going to break in my tea!” It was like a bloody Peter Kay comedy sketch! 😂
naturevalley-granola-bars
 
A non-mum related incident involved only me. I went to the toilet and when I came back I started to have a contraction so lent on the table that goes over the bed (it wasn’t over the bed at the time). Someone hadn’t put the lock on it…so I was sent plummeting to the ground! Luckily I caught myself before I actually fell over and used the husband for support instead! During labour I actually didn’t shout as much as I thought I would…I thought I’d be a screamer and a swearer but I was more of a hummer and a groaner! I did swear once, just before I started pushing and exclaimed “F**king hell!” to which I was immediately told off by my mother. I might have been 30 (just) and bring my own child into the world but apparently I can still me told off for swearing by my mum! 
 
You may or not know that when your waters go, you can’t have a bath due to risk of infection. In the early stages of labour my mum suggested I had a shower. She was still at work and said that the warm water on my back would be soothing. So I took her advice and got in the shower. Ours is an over the bath one with a shower curtain. It was soothing. The only flaw was that when I had a contraction I had nothing to hold onto and ended up trying to clutch onto the tiled wall like one of those fish that go around the glass walls of a fish tank. It also meant I had wet hair which was equally annoying…I was on all fours on the bed with a towel hanging off my head. I ended up dragging it off and throwing it like some crazy animal during another contraction however there was a lovely moment that followed when my husband sat combing my wet hair for me. 
 
Like I said at the beginning, I was quite lucky with my labour. In hospital at lunch time, baby by 4:07pm and home by 8pm in time for the England match: the World Cup was on. 
Little Baby R made a great entrance on my 30th birthday and it was such a positive, if not slightly hilarious, experience that I’m actually looking forward to doing it again! Weird eh?! 
(THIS POST WAS UPDATED IN JUNE 2016)
Keep Calm and Carry On Linking Sunday

About Educating Roversi

30 something wife and Mum to one. Blogging about parenthood, home, days out and anything else that takes my fancy!
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34 Responses to My Birth Story

  1. That is hilarious! I hope my next one is more like this as my first was a bit traumatic. Thanks for sharing! #KCACOLS

    Liked by 1 person

  2. babybykaybee says:

    You are so lucky lol i was in labor for 44 hours!! i hope my second one is this easy!! #KCACOLS

    Liked by 1 person

  3. yummyblogger says:

    You literally made me LOL with the comment about your mum being mid-dip… Brilliant!
    This is the funniest birth story I’ve ever read (and I’ve read a lot: https://yummyblogger.com/2014/05/01/birth-stories-round-up/) and great timing as I should be giving birth again any day now! Xx
    #KCACOLS

    Liked by 1 person

  4. The Pramshed says:

    This made me chuckle and hungry for a Natural Valley bar (ha ha), a great birth story that’s really different from all the others, but I found it refreshing to read. I can’t believe you were home 4 hours later, lucky you. Claire x #KCACOLS

    Liked by 1 person

  5. bread says:

    Great story, I can only hope my own babies birth is as straightforward, though I suspect it will be as random. #kcacols

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Your mum is hilarious, totally get where she’s coming from with the soggy granola hanging over her tea! I also had a quick birth, waters broke at 4am, had him by 9:44am and was home by 5pm – we had to wait for the doctors to check him out – hopefully the next will be the same when we’re ready! x #KCACOLS

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Crikey I think every other word that came out of my mouth was a swear word 🙂 good job my Mum didn’t hear.So funny x #kcacols

    Liked by 1 person

  8. Oh how funny! I always think it’s times like this when the humour comes out. We all do the strangest things don’t we. I love the biscuits. My mum never went anywhere without a picnic – even wedding dress shopping. Your mum sounds like a dream! And all on your 30th birthday – a perfect gift. Thank you for making us giggle here at #KCACOLS and we hope you can come back next Sunday. Nicky x

    Liked by 1 person

  9. Kerry says:

    That’s a nice birthing story, I do love reading them x #KCACOLS

    Liked by 1 person

  10. But I’ve dipped!!!!! At least it wasn’t a rich tea 😉 sounds like a lovely experience #KCACOLS

    Liked by 1 person

  11. I DO love a positive birth story! Love the granola/Peter Kay thing and the Del Boy moment. I was quick too and it’s good to read the quick ones! #KCACOLS

    Liked by 1 person

  12. Yeah i had to go to hospital to be checked out too, then was sent home for a bit because nothing was happening. Ha ha i bet you were going crazy with your husband! Thanks for commenting. x

    Like

  13. Suburban Mum says:

    hahah the dunking of the granola bar did make me chuckle! When I was in labour with my eldest my waters broke first so I needed to go to hospital to be checked out. My husband decided that it was a good time to pop to his old office first to pick up his post as it was on the way to the hospital – like seriously??!! We are only having a BABY! lol #KCACOLS

    Liked by 1 person

  14. mumzilla says:

    I wish mine had been like this. There were some funny moments though – Mark and the student midwife trying to take off the TENS machine without switching it off was hilarious, they got the pads stuck on them and were yelling at the electric shocks they were getting hahaha! #KCACOLS

    Liked by 1 person

  15. Emilie says:

    I had my son at Pinderfields too 🙂 At least you can look back on your experience and laugh! xx

    Liked by 1 person

  16. Sounds like quite an entertaining labour. Haha I found it rather amusing that your mum told you off for swearing. Aaaàh talk about the perfect birthday present. Xx #KCACOLS

    Liked by 1 person

  17. Oh this is a lovely birth story, it sound really joyous as well as nice and quick. How lovely that your mum was there too. The granola bar story is hilarious and I love the lightning and cloud sleep suit! #KCACOLS

    Liked by 1 person

  18. How funny! And how fab that you had a quick labour – and what a 30th birthday gift! \the abiding memory of mine is finally getting on the gas and air after hours and hours on the Tens machine at home. That stuff tasted like nectar #KCACOLS

    Liked by 1 person

  19. arthurwears says:

    I had some horrendous moments during my labour which are actually comical to look back on! Screaming down the corridor that I thought I was doing a poo whilst trying to walk to the birthing room (I wasn’t by the way, I was pushing a baby out I just didn’t realise!) Despite that, I don’t think I’m really ready to tell my story yet – mainly because I had terrible flashbacks for months and months and I’m only just getting to the stage of thinking I could do it again. Your mum sounds great. I had my husband and I genuinely couldn’t have don’t it without him,…mainly because I was left on my own for the entirety of my labour until I was pushing as the didn’t believe me when I said I thought I was much further along #KCACOLS

    Like

  20. Oh this really made me laugh! The dunking granola bar being ready for consuming – ignore the contraction! Oh and the being told off by your mum for swearing – too funny! Your friend was right – you had to pop this in a blog post – a wonderful memory in years to come! #KCACOLS

    Liked by 1 person

  21. Quick labours are the way forward!

    Like

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